Great Rules to Live By

I picked up a John Wooden book on leadership this week and was intrigued with some simple rules that Coach Wooden learned from his father. You won’t find them to be novel in any way. They are a simple set of principles to live by. He calls them, “Dad’s Two Sets of Threes.”

Instructions on Integrity…
1. Never lie.
2. Never cheat.
3. Never steal.

How to face adversity…
1. Don’t whine.
2. Don’t complain.
3. Don’t make excuses.

I had grown up hearing something extremely similar to these rules. The first 3 have always been quite easy for me to follow but the second three convicted me a little bit. More times than I care to admit, I have broken all of the last three rules. I think it’s mostly because there are times when I feel I have a right to whine, complain or make excuses due to the great injustice of adversity. Philippians 2:14 states to, “Do everything without complaining or arguing, so that you may become blameless and pure, children of God without fault in a crooked and depraved generation, in which you shine like stars in the universe…” Paul’s directions to the church at Philippi are still relevant for Christians today. We should be on a journey of becoming blameless and pure having control of our tongue. Too many times have I made situations worse or increased my struggles with adversity simply because I started talking about it in an unproductive way. That’s exactly what these rules safeguard against. When we keep the second 3 rules, it keeps us on the path of becoming rather than prolonging our wallowing in self pity. In addition to afflicting our self through whining, complaining or making excuses we commonly pull someone else into the situation. Usually, this is done behind closed doors with a third party. Most times this only poison groups of people rather than edify them. I believe the only time this can be productive is when someone checks themselves with a confidant rather than anyone who will listen.

Here are some self check questions in regard to how we deal with adversity…

What is your typical response to adversity and setbacks? If venting about a situation is necessary are you sure you are talking to the right person? (The right person would be a confidant who can remain neutral helping you check your reactions) Are you damaging the person you are whining or complaining to? Are you trying to get your listener to be on your side of the argument?